Pauline is our guest blogger today. She is the mother of 4, grandmother of 15, great-grandmother of 9. She is known for generosity—and her biscuits—and she is a true southern girl who cooks for those she loves. Pauline shares an experience with her great-grandson from a few years ago.

I have had problems with my eyes for years. I needed cataract surgery and we had to postpone it until the inflammation in my eyes calmed down. When I finally was able to have the surgery on my eye, I had to wear a patch for seven weeks. It was a long time. I worried that my grandchildren would be afraid of me. I didn’t want the patch to scare them. Our favorite activity is for me to read stories to my grandchildren. I love for them to sit on my lap or by my side as we read. I didn’t want to miss that because they were afraid of me with a patch on my eye.

I came to my daughter’s house for dinner one Sunday after my surgery. I was sitting on the couch in her living room and John, then 3, said to me, “Eye hurt?” pointing to the patch. I said it did. None of my great-grandchildren were afraid of me. During the next seven weeks, our relationship was the same.

After the seven weeks were over and my patch was removed, I was again at my daughter’s home for Sunday dinner. I was sitting on the couch and John came up to me and said, “Eye all better now?” None of the other children ever asked about it. None of them were afraid. John was so compassionate and so feeling with his great grandma and her eye surgery.

How can we show compassion today?

Last week, we ventured out to a fabulous local park. This park has so many amazing activities–swings, slides, an AstroTurf hill to climb & slide down, moving balance beams, a spider web, a water pump, and a butterfly garden.

 As we were leaving the park, though, our six-year-old discovered a butterfly on a plant. The butterfly’s wings were wet from the recent rains, and our son could hold it as it crawled and creeped from hand to arm to hand. He did not want to leave this beautiful creature that had trusted him enough to hold it.

We talked of what would happen if we took it home. Would it be safe in the car? Probably not. Do we have the right kinds of plants for it to drink? No. He continued to long for the connection he felt, yet he urged the butterfly from his grasp onto a bunch of fuchsia flowers. I felt relieved that he did what was best for the butterfly even though leaving it was difficult for him. I began to walk toward our car with a weight off my shoulders.

Then he called me back. Oh, no. Maybe he had reconsidered. I braced myself for a further plea to take it home, when, as I approached, he said delightfully, “Look, Mom, it’s drinking!” He was an enchanted witness to the beautiful butterfly sipping nectar from the soft deep cove within the flower. His letting go of the butterfly allowed the creature to live and be what it needed to be.

I am grateful for the wisdom of my six-year-old and for the lessons we have learned from a butterfly.

Yesterday, I started wearing braces. Now, it is not unusual that adults get braces to straighten their teeth, but I wore braces 37 years ago. This time, I wear braces because we need to place an implant. So, I have decided that since I am getting new teeth, and now braces, I am living proof that a second childhood exists…

There are many advantages to my second childhood. The most obvious is that I have already lived through my first childhood. So, getting braces yesterday was not new to me. Yes, there have been advances in equipment; I watched a video on home care, I have brackets on most of my teeth, to name a few. Only one tooth will be banded, where all my teeth were banded 37 years ago. Basically, I was calm through the whole process. I remember how to use wax, and I was prepared for eating soft foods for a few days. I knew these things from my experience.

My support system is different. I was the oldest child and was first in my family to have braces. Now, I have children who are supportive and who have lived the experiences of braces. Last night, my daughters and I sang at a church meeting. I commented to my orthodontist that I wasn’t sure I timed it right to get my braces put on the afternoon before singing, but I did fine. When I walked into the room at church where the meeting was being held, my three daughters were sitting at a table and said, “Let me see!” So, the ice was broken. I was free to laugh (which we did a lot), and we sang together which is always fun.

My husband, as always, has been great. I love having a cheerleader in my corner. He made chili for me Wednesday night so that I would have soft food. Today, he made me carrot juice. He went with me to the orthodontist and bought me Tylenol on the way home to ease my headache.

My expectations now are based on knowledge. The reason I have braces again is not the same as before. I also have lived with me for a lot longer and know me better. So, I have very realistic expectations. Last night, one of the brackets came off while I was brushing my teeth. I didn’t panic because my doctor had said that this will be a possible problem. I also have learned to deal with the ups and downs of life.

Would I go back and relive my first childhood? No, I think I will stay with this one. The funniest comment came from my husband as we were talking about me writing this blog. He recalled that he knew me when I had braces before, but this time he gets to pay for them.

We have more things to go through until the process of restoration is complete. My second childhood could last for a long, long time. Who knows? Perhaps I will spontaneously break out into song…oh, I already do that. Well, maybe I never left my first childhood.

Have an empowered day realizing the lessons you have learned from your life. How can you share an experience with your family members or a friend to empower their day?

Work.  Yes, you read that right.  I didn’t always feel this way.  Believe me.  I worked very hard to get out of doing work when I was younger.  My mother used to tell me that if I spent half the energy working on whatever task was at hand as I spent trying to get out of working, I would be finished, relieved, etc.  (I keep wondering why the wisdom of listening to my amazing mother surpassed me as a youth?…and I find myself trying to teach the same principle to children in my home now…!)  Nevertheless, I digress….

I have discovered the value of work (yes, I know I learned a little late on this one) since I have been married.  My husband grew up working on a farm.  From dawn till dusk and even after dark, his dad took him out with his brothers to work.  Physical work is just a part of who they are, and valuing work has earned them the respect of many of their coworkers and colleagues through the years.  His example of consistent work has helped me value this attribute.

Actually, the work that I enjoy doing may seem a bit out of the ordinary.  I honestly enjoy hand washing my delicate clothing–feeling the cool water slosh on my hands, letting the soap bubbles pop on my fingers as I shift and turn and move the clothing around to make it clean.  As I wash these few clothes by hand, I am reminded of women, generations before me, who washed all their clothing by hand in cool streams with handmade soap, and I feel gratitude for them and a kinship with them.

I also like the physical working with my hands when I cook.  Though I knead most of my bread in a mixer (I love my Bosch), I do occasionally knead by hand or work the dough for noodles.  I love the feeling of the dough–like earthen clay–squishing through my fingers and pushing the ball of dough with the palm of my hand.

When I am hand washing, cooking, or even when I am vacuuming, I am able to think, ponder, and receive insight through the blessings of work.  So, yes, I do.  I like to work.  Thanks, Mom, for being patient with me.  I am finally beginning to learn all the things you diligently taught me.