Aug 10
13
Going, Going, Gone
Our guest blog today is by Abby. Abby volunteers in her community and is a mother and grandmother. She is a great friend and prolific writer. Today, she shares her insights about a child growing up and going to college.
Saying goodbye is often difficult. I was talking with my dear friend tonight about our children leaving for college. We decided that we want our children to grow up, but we don’t want the pain of growing with them. As I considered this, these thoughts followed:
I love my children, every one of them. I know that the best thing for them, and eventually for me, is for my children to grow up and be on their own. The growth that takes place from being in a new place, making new friends, setting up your own support systems, and taking care of yourself enlivens the soul. These growth experiences rarely come by staying in the same place.
I must say that the hardest part has been missing my child. I think about him every time I fold laundry. I feel like something is missing. I looked for some vegetables for dinner in my freezer and I found his favorite ice cream that no one is here to eat now. The most interesting loss to me, though, was to listen to someone play the piano at church. Life has been so busy preparing that there was little piano playing. Yet, when I sat waiting for church to start and was listening to the music, my eyes filled with tears because I missed my child.
It sounds very ominous and lonely. I just have been surprised by it all. After all, I have always wanted my children to be independent and self-sufficient. Haven’t I? Yes, that really was me.
So, I will share the joys of life since college. Every day, right now, I get a telephone call with some new exciting adventure. I hear about wanting to make new friends, but not crossing boundaries and being thought of as “weird” (my word). I also get the excitement of learning, learning much differently than before. Harder work, but more rewarding. I get to experience with my child the joy of knowing the right school was chosen. Today, he said that he was sure that he was making good friends.
Life is new and exciting for him, but I come home to his empty room and no one to eat his favorite ice cream. Though I feel an emptiness, this change brings joy to my heart to know that everything is going to be all right for both of us.
