We have recently had many blogs whose titles start with the letter “c.” I thought about writing about chili. I made a pot to simmer all day because we have a cold front here. And it is delicious! Oh, I need to get back on topic…

We live in a world that constantly changes. The weather changes. What we eat for dinner changes. In our lives, our routine has been changing. Some changes are good: friends calling to check on a loved one, seeing old friends, trying a new recipe a friend recommended, making up new recipes to accommodate newly discovered food allergies. Some changes are hard: sickness, surgery, job loss, loved ones who pass away, weather changes that make you weary.

Yet, changes are all around us. It’s what we do and how we react to the changes that make the difference. I think we can learn lessons from the changes in our lives. This week, I have been working on organizing while I am homebound. It feels good to go through papers, put books back on their shelves, give away and share. I have relived memories as I sort through papers, pictures, talks given, lesson outlines for teaching and craft supplies.

The changes in our home help us feel loved and connected. We have spent more time together reading, talking and just enjoying being together. Not all of our family members have had this reprieve, but I have enjoyed the changes in my schedule. In fact, I have decided that change is good.

What change will you make to improve your life next week?

These one-word titles that begin with the letter “C” seem to be popular lately:  “Connection,” “Compassion,” and now “Commitment.”  Funny, huh?

Well, since I made my commitment to all of you last week to work on my attitude, I wanted to let you know how I was doing.  And as much as I would love to tell you that I’ve done great, I’d much rather tell you the truth…which happens to be that I haven’t done that well.  But!  there is an upside:  I have been more conscious of when my attitude is lousy, and have started to take that consciousness and turn it into action.  So, although I still wallow in my negativity more than I should, I now take steps to overcome it more than I used to.  Yay progress!

So I ask, what changed?  What exactly was the catalyst that sent me from where I was to where I am?  (Hint:  look at the title of this blog.)  Yes!  That’s it!  My commitment!

Can I tell you how much it meant to me to know that out there in the great wide expanse of the internet, there were people to whom I had made a commitment?  Granted, some were people I do not know and may never meet, and most of the ones I do know wouldn’t say anything even if they knew my commitment wasn’t perfectly kept, but still–I had made a commitment, and I was going to keep it.  That fact gave me courage and resolve to do the thing that I found difficult, but which I had promised to do. 

Commitments are hard–sometimes to make, sometimes to keep.  But I have found through this and other experiences that commitments are also empowering.  The accountability they require is motivating.  What can you commit to do that will empower you?

Marissa is on a leave of abscence today and so we are posting a previously posted blog.  Enjoy!

I’ve pretty much always loved baseball, as well as most sports, and country music. Until recently, no one really knew of my love for these things. Somehow, when I was a kid I got this funny idea that if I liked these things no one else would like me. This is a weird thing, I know…but that’s what I thought.

I’m guessing that this funny idea came from the fact that during a particularly impressionable time in my childhood the people around me just weren’t into baseball, most other sports, or country music. I’m not quite sure how this idea, that if I liked these I would be rejected, stuck with me but it was so important to me to fit in that I suppressed my love of baseball, most other sports, and country music.

Thankfully in recent months, I have slowly allowed myself to love these things for real and spend time learning about and listening to them choosing not to care too much about what other people thought. I created a Taylor Swift station on Pandora Radio and listen to it often. I purchased a Tampa Bay Rays hat and wear it almost everywhere. I watched part of the World Series on television and a handful of college football games when my schedule allowed. I embraced without reservation the fact that in my Athletic Training major I get to associate with athletes on almost a daily basis. I started going to more of their games.

And do you know what? My family didn’t kick me out for liking different things than they do and have still supported me with my love of sports and country. My friends still talk to me and I’ve made dozens of new ones just by possessing these interests more openly. I now know way more about baseball, which I love learning about. I like country music more than I ever thought I would now that I know more songs and artists, and most of all I love my life way more by being myself.

So whatever part of you there is that you might be scared to admit and share, I say go for it! You will be so much happier being true to yourself and those who really love you will love you still. I know…I tried it. There is such an invigorating feeling that comes when we choose to be who we really are and want to be. Whether it’s baseball and country music or flamingos and parasailing, I say go for it. Live your life fully and completely going confidently in the directions where you find joy.

How will you show others how awesome you are by being true to yourself this week?

Pauline is our guest blogger today. She is the mother of 4, grandmother of 15, great-grandmother of 9. She is known for generosity—and her biscuits—and she is a true southern girl who cooks for those she loves. Pauline shares an experience with her great-grandson from a few years ago.

I have had problems with my eyes for years. I needed cataract surgery and we had to postpone it until the inflammation in my eyes calmed down. When I finally was able to have the surgery on my eye, I had to wear a patch for seven weeks. It was a long time. I worried that my grandchildren would be afraid of me. I didn’t want the patch to scare them. Our favorite activity is for me to read stories to my grandchildren. I love for them to sit on my lap or by my side as we read. I didn’t want to miss that because they were afraid of me with a patch on my eye.

I came to my daughter’s house for dinner one Sunday after my surgery. I was sitting on the couch in her living room and John, then 3, said to me, “Eye hurt?” pointing to the patch. I said it did. None of my great-grandchildren were afraid of me. During the next seven weeks, our relationship was the same.

After the seven weeks were over and my patch was removed, I was again at my daughter’s home for Sunday dinner. I was sitting on the couch and John came up to me and said, “Eye all better now?” None of the other children ever asked about it. None of them were afraid. John was so compassionate and so feeling with his great grandma and her eye surgery.

How can we show compassion today?

A sweet, almost 5-year-old in my life, is growing out her bangs. She hates rubber bands, ponytails, braids, or barrettes, so her hair hangs in her face much of the day. One day recently, though, while brushing her hair before school, I slid two purple barrettes on either side of her face. I loved looking into her eyes without the screen of her hair blocking my view.

When she got home from school, I asked, “Where are your barrettes?” She reached into each pocket and pulled out a barrette from either side. “Did they hurt your head?” She shook her head no. Then I inquired, “Did someone say they were pretty?” Her head moved up & down affirmatively.

You see, she does NOT like to be noticed by her appearance. She hates wearing dresses on Sunday to church because she thinks someone will say she looks so beautiful. She knows she’s beautiful; she just doesn’t like to hear it.

Now, if you want to praise this young lady, notice her strength. Tell her she has strong muscles. Let her know you are amazed that she can carry her 30 lbs sibling around the house with ease or pick up her classmates as she hugs them goodbye. These are the ways she likes to be noticed.

As I thought about her, I wondered how I like to be noticed…and for what reasons I like to be appreciated. I am still pondering. Do you know how to appreciate those in your life in ways they like to be noticed? What do you do that you like others to notice about you?

We have a friend who said that our family is experiencing the hardest time in our lives. I know others who have as great challenges as we have and some who are experiencing greater challenges right now. We reached the point, long ago, when I thought we had all that we could bear. Still things kept coming.

I marvel at the lessons God has given to us during these difficult times. I think of them as gifts of love. I am amazed at the many miracles He has created to share His love with us.

One of the great gifts of love he gives is friendship. In the last two weeks, I found that friendship and love can remain with us without frequent contact and I am awed by the amount of love that I can feel. I felt the strength of sustaining prayers. I felt the concern of others. I was literally enveloped in the arms of love.

I wish, sometimes, that life was not so hard. But how else can we learn the lessons so that we can grow to be more like God? I am grateful for the strength of my children and my husband through our experiences in the past year. How marvelous and great are the many bounteous blessings of our God in our lives.

I want to share one experience of the many great gifts given to our family. Last Thursday afternoon, after an especially long and trying day, my friend and I were going to visit someone who is sick. She was unable to see us and so my friend said that we could go for a ride. We did.

We decided to go shopping because she needed a new wallet. We went only in two stores. The second store, she found the wallet she wanted and I decided to buy one for me. My friend decided to give the wallet to me as a gift. I hesitated, but decided to be a gracious recipient.

I put the wallet in my bag and carried it around for a few days. Tuesday, I had a doctor’s appointment and I placed the check to pay the doctor in the new wallet. When I pulled it out to pay the doctor, I felt a sense of newness. I needed to have things that were new. I needed to get rid of the things that reminded me of my old life and start fresh. I hadn’t realized that such a small thing, a wallet, would help me move forward. It did. And each time I see it or touch it, I think of my dear sweet friend, who has been my strength over many years. Thank you, DeAnne. Thank you for understanding and loving me.

There are so many people who remain nameless right now, but someday, we will feel free to share their names and their gifts to us during our trials. I thank you too.

How can you show your love to a friend today?

The weather changes.  People change.  Even Facebook changes (pretty often, actually, much to the complaint of many of my friends).

We change the laundry.  We change the TV channel.  We change our hair cut, color, and style.

Those things on the first list are things we have no control over (like, I seriously doubt that we’ll ever get a “Dislike” button, no matter how many groups are devoted to “petitioning” for one; my reasoning for this must be saved for a future blog…maybe).  But the second list?  Yeah, I definitely have a say in when laundry gets done, what shows we watch, and what color my hair is, and I’d bet that you do too (well, at least some of the time ).  There are many changes which you control.

Control is something I ponder pretty frequently because I really, really like to possess it…when it’s convenient (haha!).  Such a desire for control can cause me some serious stress, most of which is totally unnecessary–and I am absolutely, totally sure that you never, ever do that to yourself.  Right?

But just in case there are a few of you out there like me, I’ll continue.  Of course there are TONS of things we can’t control–the length of the drive-thru line, others’ behavior, your genetics, and many, many more–and they drive us crazy!!!!  But, see, here’s the secret to help all you control freaks out there (and over here):  there is ALWAYS something about it we can change…

Our attitudes!  You’ve seen, just as I have, the effects of a particularly good or bad attitude on the whole atmosphere of a room, a meeting, a home.  What if that attitude were yours?  I confess that much of the time, my attitude’s been pretty lousy lately.  I’m committing, right here on the World Wide Web to all you friends, neighbors, and total strangers that I will change it.  I don’t promise to be perfect, but I promise to do better.  (See this blog for a discussion on that.)  Because…

We can change our clothing.  We can change diapers.  We can change our attitudes.  And doing so, we can change the world.

Well dearest fans who read my blogs faithfully it has come to that one magical time of the week where you will hear once again the words which I have to say to you. Perhaps you recognize this title from a song that came out in a hit movie about a year ago. This movie was viewed by me and my college friends on opening night. We arrived really early and smushed inbetween oodles of 12 year old girls along with siblings, mothers, aunts, best friends and anyone else who could muster half as much love as they had for their future husband Zac Efron to watch the movie for the very first time…
We screamed with everyone else as he captured the screen along with the rest of the High School Musical cast. It was definitely a night to remember.

As cheesey as it is for me to actually admit that I have a somewhat hidden love for HSM now, the moment, as well as that song has meant something to me for a while.

All I wanna do is be with you…

There are and have been lots of people I’ve felt that way toward. In the movie it has to do with two people in love however I know it can mean sooo much more than that. Sometimes all I want to do is be with my mom folding laundry on her bed and talking about boys or friends or boyfriends. Sometimes all I wanna do is be with my friends or watch a movie with my little brother. All I wanna do on certain afternoons is go shopping with my sisters or make a run to the library. I often feel like all I wanna do is be with the characters in my book and write the story of their lives. And sometimes, often among the most important of times all I wanna do is be with myself listening to my heart and contemplating the deepest desires of my soul.
So whoever it is you wanna be with today…find a way to spend time with them even if it’s only a phone call or letter. You can feel mpowered by being with those you love.

Stephanie, our guest blogger today, is always ready to share her kind thoughts with those around her. She is a devoted mother and woman of great faith. She recently took up working with stained glass, and her quiet kindnesses speak volumes of her character. Enjoy!

It is the little things in life that help us along our way. I have read the blogs about empowering us to become better people, mothers, nurturers, sisters, etc. and thought I have little to nothing to contribute and have been putting off blogging as requested by the ladies who initiated this site. Then I stopped at a fast food restaurant on a busy day from running errands, feeling a bit frazzled. As I got my meal and sat down I saw a woman come in who looked more frazzled than I did. As she got her meal and looked for a seat our eyes met and I smiled at her. She seemed to breathe a sigh of relief and sat a couple of tables from me, but facing me. We both ate in a silent companionship, strangers yet somehow acquaintances. As I finished my meal and prepared to go my way, she hesitantly spoke, very softly like she was afraid someone might hear her. She thanked me for smiling at her. She told me she had had a very trying morning and my smile brought her reassurance and comfort. It was a little thing and I don’t know who this sister of ours was, but it made me feel good to hear I had helped bring her comfort in a trying time. I left the restaurant with a lighter step and a smile in my heart. So sisters, smile as you go about your day, you never know who may be watching and needing that smile.

Thanks Mary Lynn for helping to create this venue. It was inspired.

Steph

Women’s health issues are often at the forefront of my mind. I feel fairly self-educated through my own study, through personal experience, and through hearing first-hand experiences of women in my life. As a mother, I have learned more and am fairly well-versed in topics such as prenatal care, breastfeeding, birth control, and baby wearing. I even carried on a competent conversation with a health professional last week regarding pediatric hemolysis (blood destroying its own cells). Still, through all this experience, seeing and hearing of people in my life suffering through health issues, especially the women in my life, bring feelings very close to the surface of my heart. These strong feelings are one reason I feel so passionately about this site to support women and mothers.

Recently, a close friend came over to help me prepare a card and meal for another dear friend who was suffering a tragedy. As I prepared the meal, I thought of other meals by similar hands wanting to alleviate the pain of a loved one. I thought of times when women in my life had experienced similar circumstances when I was too young and unaware to help care for their needs. I remembered my mother, and my husband’s mother, and my dear sister-in-law who had similar experiences to my friend. I knew there were women in their lives who came in their hours of need to bring relief to my mothers and sister. My heart was full of gratitude for these women who had helped the women in my life. I thought of the family of my friend. I thought of them–across the miles–praying for their sister & hoping someone would be their hands to deliver a meal, their arms to comfort through a hug, their mouths to warm with a smile. I felt connected to all these individuals in one small moment. I felt part of a chain, linked together apart from time and space, bound through love which transcends earthly power. These connections we make in this existence are worth the sacrifices of time and energy, of personal preference and self-satisfaction. They are what bless us with support and success, with new energy and life. So, tragedy eventually brings hope, and sorrow yields to joy. I feel greatly blessed to, even if in a very small way, be a part of this experience and live, even if just for moment, in this connection.